Comments on: 6 Tips to Help You Save for a Down Payment on a Home http://www.quizzle.com/blog/2009/10/6-tips-to-help-you-save-for-a-down-payment-on-a-home/ Personal Finance Blog Fri, 10 Feb 2012 01:59:06 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Sherry http://www.quizzle.com/blog/2009/10/6-tips-to-help-you-save-for-a-down-payment-on-a-home/comment-page-1/#comment-5113 Sherry Sat, 24 Apr 2010 18:25:52 +0000 http://blog.quizzle.com/?p=537#comment-5113 Well as a working woman who has been married for 20 wonderful years come this December I disagree with the only one bank account idea. Each person needs to have his or her discretionary money. Arguments about money - lack of or spending of - are the biggest source of strife in marriages. When we were first married we had one account. I always felt broke because as a woman I have more small but personal expenses than my husband and always needed a little extra for that. He never said anything but I didn't want to even wonder if one day he would ask me what I spent $X on. Now, we have our money, his money and my money. We have one account which we call the house account in which we each place a certain amount per month and from that account we pay the mortgage and other household expenses. We also have other accounts for emergency fund/savings etc. To help with saving for that, we automatically put a certain amount per month - upfront - just like a bill. If you only put "left overs" you don't really stretch yourself to achieve your goal. If you run into a situation where we need the money, we can still get to it easily but at least it isn't in with our regular money which would cause us to think we have more discretionary funds than we actually do. In the honeymoon phase when you think love is ALL you need for a marriage to work, one account may seem like a good idea. Once the honeymoon is over, you realize that love grows but changes and the work of marriage begins. Also, the idea of one account might seem to work well when you are fresh out of college and not much income. As time passes and incomes grow, people change, their tastes and desires change, and people need to feel comfortable in the marriage without arguments about how money is spent. Don't wait until you have money to argue over to set up these separate accounts. Do it early in the relationship. This has nothing to do with lack of trust or fear of divorce. As a woman coming into your own, it is important to have some money, if it is even a little, that is yours that you don't have to ask permission to spend. Trust me on this. As you get older and develop in your career, you will thank me for that advice! My very best wishes to you on your upcoming marriage. Well as a working woman who has been married for 20 wonderful years come this December I disagree with the only one bank account idea. Each person needs to have his or her discretionary money. Arguments about money – lack of or spending of – are the biggest source of strife in marriages. When we were first married we had one account. I always felt broke because as a woman I have more small but personal expenses than my husband and always needed a little extra for that. He never said anything but I didn’t want to even wonder if one day he would ask me what I spent $X on. Now, we have our money, his money and my money. We have one account which we call the house account in which we each place a certain amount per month and from that account we pay the mortgage and other household expenses. We also have other accounts for emergency fund/savings etc. To help with saving for that, we automatically put a certain amount per month – upfront – just like a bill. If you only put “left overs” you don’t really stretch yourself to achieve your goal. If you run into a situation where we need the money, we can still get to it easily but at least it isn’t in with our regular money which would cause us to think we have more discretionary funds than we actually do.

In the honeymoon phase when you think love is ALL you need for a marriage to work, one account may seem like a good idea. Once the honeymoon is over, you realize that love grows but changes and the work of marriage begins.

Also, the idea of one account might seem to work well when you are fresh out of college and not much income. As time passes and incomes grow, people change, their tastes and desires change, and people need to feel comfortable in the marriage without arguments about how money is spent. Don’t wait until you have money to argue over to set up these separate accounts. Do it early in the relationship. This has nothing to do with lack of trust or fear of divorce. As a woman coming into your own, it is important to have some money, if it is even a little, that is yours that you don’t have to ask permission to spend. Trust me on this. As you get older and develop in your career, you will thank me for that advice!

My very best wishes to you on your upcoming marriage.

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